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HOW WILL YOU BE REMEMBERED?

"Make a dent in the universe” BONO of U2

An amazing leader, innovator, thinker has passed.  From Europe to Asia, throngs of fans flocked to Apple stores worldwide to offer flowers, effigies and even their ubiquitous logo: apples to celebrate the life of Steve Jobs.  One message says it all in one store in Manhattan; printed in bold letters the words “I Thank You”

THE TOP BUSINESS SKILLS EVERY PERSON SHOULD LEARN

Since the beginning of “TAPSIBLOGS” we have always put a premium on soft skills in business; not only is it ever practiced, it apparently is so hard to find.  The values of integrity, teamwork, leadership and determination take time to acquire while all the more being so difficult to influence on others to create a sound organization. 

Thing is, every Dick, Joe and Harry in our business of training has been saying the same for the longest time.  Now I am in no way trying to devalue soft skills being applied in your personal and professional lives, I actually rally behind it.  The problem is, being inspired is not enough to get you where you want to be in your career.  Technical skills are imperative.  And so I listed some of the most important business skills every person who wants to advance in their careers should learn.

THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS DESTINY

A woman went to a fortune teller to consult the future of her wealthy husband.  With a great degree of concern the psychic announced “Your husband will be found dead before the end of this week!”

Apparently unperturbed by the shocking news the wife then blurted out “Do you think I will get away with it?”

Now I will try to be a little controversial for writing this but I have always been uncomfortable at the thought that I completely have no control over my life; emphasis on the word completely.  The line that says all the world’s a stage and that we are merely actors makes me believe that I at least have time to rehearse right? 

DRAFT PICK: Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell

Was Bill Gates really a genius or was he born lucky?

What was the Beatles' biggest break as a band?

Why are Asian children better at math than the Western?

Are rich kids relatively smarter than poorer ones?

If you're recipe for success is purely determination and hardwork, think again. 

In this page turner by Malcolm Gladwell, he gathers documentary evidence that points out why the most successful people, from Bill Gates to the Beatles came to be.  He also creates a strong argument that success is heavily dependent not just on who you are, but t a certain extent where you're from.

Outliers is amazingly inexpensive at P285 but highly addictive.  It might change the way you think about success.

ARE YOU STUCK?

Do you feel that you are not getting anywhere near your dreams?  Do you feel things have been the same, the same tasks, same cubicle and coworkers for the longest time that you’re actually getting sick of it? 

This is a story I lifted from author Tony Buzan’s book “Embracing Change” here’s how it goes:

WHY WE DO WHAT WE DO

Please allow me to share with you a personal story.

A few years ago when I started SUCCESS COACH® I literally experienced what most people would call the proverbial “birth pains” in business.  Part of those pains was the need to establish yourself as a legitimate, credible service provider.  The first couple of months in the business was like hitting a concrete wall; very few leads and almost no nods.  Contracts were slow and few in between that I had to live off whatever savings I had left and even resorted to borrowing money from people just to get by.  There were even times that I had to skip lunch if ever I was on the road because I wouldn’t have enough money to get back home.  I honestly started to doubt if this was the path I truly wanted to take. 

Things changed one August night.

12 TIPS TOWARDS BECOMING AN EFFECTIVE TEAM PLAYER

The amazing TSA team

Just this week I was fortunate enough to be the speaker and facilitator of the team building program of one of the country’s top companies Terry S.A. They are the authorized distributors of leading brands such as David and Goliath, Dupe, Pininho and of course Havaianas.  All in all they were a great bunch of young individuals just having fun.

TODAY'S SPECIALTY: ADOBONG MATA NG BABOY

I created a new label called "TODAY'S SPECIALTY".  It (hopes) to feature my new craving for the exotic - food i mean.  Besides, I'm a big fan of Andrew Zimmern.  


I've always been telling people to try new things, new cuisine and new places so I'll go ahead and take the lead.  I just hope that in this new segment I can entice you to try the same.


I kinda squirmed at the first thought of pig eyes, maybe because of not so memorable experiences with fish eyes.  But once I got to that first bite I said hey, it's pretty darn good!

Maybe I'll put cow eyes next.


What to try next... 


What have you tried or dare me to?


Decisions, decisions...

A Social Experiment by Lourd de Veyra

BATTERED AND BRUISED

Tonight I just came from a basketball tournament sponsored by our local barangay.  It’s only the second game in our league but I could already feel my complete anatomy asking for an overhaul.  I’ve got a bruised right shoulder, a nagging left shoulder, a head bump, sprained pinkies, an aching left heel, a malfunctioning left knee and a case of tennis elbow.  I just recently turned 35 this April but I definitely feel like 55 in basketball years.  I definitely have reason to believe that people like me should be made shareholders of Alaxan.  In Accounting parlance I am now what you might call “fully depreciated!”

IF YOU HAD ONE DAY LEFT TO LIVE WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

On the last day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher.

The florist’s son gave the teacher a bouquet of flowers.

The candy store owner gave the teacher a box of candies.

Then the liquor store owner’s son brought a big, heavy box.  The teacher lifted it up and noticed that it was leaking a little bit.

She touched a drop of the liquid with her finger and tasted it.

“is it wine?” she said.

“No.” the boy replied.

She tasted another drop and said “Champagne?”

THANK YOU

Last Saturday March 19, 2011, yours truly and a group of friends went to the Pediatrics Ward of the Pasig City General Hospital to give away a few blessings to the less fortunate.  The smiles and thank you’s were definitely worth all the effort.

This was made possible because of YOUR contribution! 

 For every engagement of SUCCESS COACH’s seminars, training programs or business consultations, a portion of our professional fees are set aside to benefit the LESSONS OF LIFE Project (LOL Project), a non-profit organization created to advocate personal development as well as to help patients in need at different charity wards.

When is enough really enough?

A man was driving along a rural road one day when he saw a three legged chicken running down the road. He was amused enough to drive along side it for a while, as he was driving he noticed the chicken was running 30 mph.

Pretty fast chicken, he thought, I wonder just how fast it can run. So he sped up and the chicken did too! They were now moving along the road at 45 mph!

The man in the car sped up again, to his surprise the chicken was still running ahead of him at 60 mph!!!

WHAT DO I DO WITH NEGATIVE PEOPLE?

A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was

their looks. If one felt it was too hot, the other thought it

was too cold. If one said the TV was too loud, the other claimed

the volume needed to be turned up. Opposite in every way, one

was an eternal optimist, the other a doom & gloom pessimist.

Just to see what would happen, on the twins' birthday their

father loaded the pessimist's room with every imaginable toy and

game. The optimist's room he loaded with horse manure.

That night the father passed by the pessimist's room and found

him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly.

Your Mantras for Success this 2011

Cheering really does help!

Sports teams have cheerleaders, rugby teams have their Hakas, kids have their Lolas!  Sure you're cute and talented and all that, but without a really good push it's really harder to get where you want to be.

So this new year where do you want to be? Do you want to lose weight? Want to improve your career or earn more money?  Do you want to finally tie the knot if not find someone to tie it with?  Well whatever it is you wish for to improve this 2011, let me give you some "cheers" or mantras, words to say to yourself to help lift you up to that level of improvement. 

THE BEST AND MOST INEXPENSIVE GIFTS THIS CHRISTMAS

Attention: The malls are open until midnight.

WHOA!

It's pretty amusing to watch people during this period. Everyone at a frenzy, rushing to beat the Christmas rush, paperbags in hand and children sometimes in tow. I found it to be literally easier to win the lottery than to find a parking space in the malls!

The beauty though in all the madness is the reason WHY people are in crazy shopping mode: they're in it for someone else. I observed that almost every shopper I see is singleminded in making a loved one, a colleague or friend a bit happier.

LOSE YOUR SIGHT BUT NEVER YOUR VISION

A vision is not just a picture of what could be; it is an appeal to our better selves, a call to become something more.

Rosabeth Moss Kanter

I want to share with you a conversation I had with a client of mine whom I consider also a friend Mr Jon Herrera.  Jon along with his sister Rosario are the people behind some of the newest and trendiest places such as Greyone Social, Status Magazine, Styles Entertainment, Trilogy Boutique, Embassy Superclub and now Encore.  

After just several years Jon and company had been able to create and reinvent the way we shop, dine, party and be entertained.  As early as 2003 I've had this sort of prediction that a new breed of businessmen, from different originations, philosophies and cultures are going to take Philippine business by storm.  The umbrella company of Styles Entertainment is definitely one if not the first of them.

I was having lunch with Jon early this year and I was asking him how he started on his journey to success.  His answer to me was very simple yet profound.  He said  

"Everybody sees the swan but not the ugly duckling that came before that."

Simple, but very true.

He then went on to share his story with me when he was just 18.  He said he wrote down in his journals his visions for his future.  He wanted to be a DJ, own a cafe and restaurant and be a successful entrepreneur.  Coming from a conservative background in the States he did have his share of doubters and naysayers, but went on to burn his ships as the story goes and never looked back.  True enough though, acting as if it was impossible to fail Jon realized his dream of becoming a DJ, owning a cafe and restaurant, while having the time of his life doing it!

So what made the difference for Jon that's so elusive to so many?  Was it a cosmic alignment of the solar system that made the sequence of events conducive for him to succeed or was it just a lucky roll of a dice?  Did he have something about him the same with every other successful person that none of us has discovered yet? 

I have had the wonderful opportunity to help several companies create and develop their own Values, Mission and Vision statements.  Most if not all of them do this to reevaluate their corporate direction and culture.  These companies ask the ultimate questions:  Why am I here?  Why do I exist, and am I on the right track?

Picture yourself like a ship, complete with a dock, sail and crew.  Chart a clear course and more often than not you will reach your destination.  Get that same ship, complete with everything but a destination and you will get nothing but a piece of metal and wood being swept by the waves treading where the winds take it.  You'd be lucky if you ever leave the docks at all. 

The very first but also most important step in Personal Development is creating your own vision.  Unfortunately this is where a lot of people get stuck or get it all wrong.  "To become a millionaire by thirty" or "Simply fulfill my dreams" won't cut it.  I have several signposts for you that I hope can help you draw up a clear vision for yourself:

1.)  Whose dream is it? - a lot of people get caught up in the hype of materialism that they are lead to believe someone else's dream is also theirs.  Are you pursuing a career that YOU chose yourself or did someone else plot it out for you?  I took up Accountancy in college only to find out I didn't want to spend the rest of my life behind a desk.  I found out later on that I enjoyed designing and being creative.  I particularly enjoyed interacting with people, a lot of them which was something I wouldn't have been able to do in front of ledgers and worksheets. 

On the other hand, so many of us believe that having a six figure salary is the penultimate point that you have "made it"  Tell that to a friend of mine named Eugene who works as a highly paid executive in New York.  He does get his six figures, the quarterly travels and all the perks but never considers himself a success.  His setbacks in his personal relationships mask the glitter of all the rewards he's been receiving.  Wouldn't you want to be working so hard and be genuinely thankful, not resentful for where you have gone?  If you kept on doing what you are doing now, where would you want to be?  This brings me to the next point:

2.)  What pushes you? -  I sincerely believe that one of the best motivators for any person is the opportunity to be recognized for something they do well.  With that being said I understand why some many people dread going to work everyday.  They simply are not in a position where they have the chance to shine, or are doing something that does not credit their talents and skills.  What is it that you are good at?  Is it making and executing sales presentations, designing marketing collaterals or putting together software programs?  This is called your core competence.

Your core literally means from your center, your gut.  This is what keeps your creative juices flowing, it's what excites you to come to work in the morning and stay up a little bit more at night.  Eventually this core competence is what picks you out from the crowd and gets you ahead.  Identifying a person for what he does well and rewards him for it in time pushes them to go further in performance and deeper in commitment. 

Sadly not too many of us are in a position right now where we are chasing a dream we have always wanted, or do something that fuels our God given abilities but do not despair.  Today is as good a day as any to reflect and take action.  Companies go to great lengths and distances to conduct strategic planning sessions.  I just hope they don't come out of those brainstorming sessions just to reiterate a singular vision of being more profitable.     

Ask yourself the questions I posed on those signposts, see if your personal mission aligns with the culture of your company and that it fosters the development of your talents and skills.  If you suddenly find yourself lost and in need of a push, just keep that image of where you want to be, how you can help other people and make a difference right in your sights.  Then ask yourself the same question Jon gave me once you've finalized your vision:

"What book are you reading?"

Talent Is Never Enough

I'm hooked on the show Top Chef.  It's showing daily on one of our cable channels and I only catch reruns at 11:00pm and I try not to miss a single episode.  It's the only reality show I ever really watch maybe because deep inside all of us is a longing to become one. Being a chef has become increasing popular a client of mine once said they're the new rockstars; immensely popular, culturally refined and besides, women love a man who can cook.

For the life of me I can't even boil an egg, or know what's one cup of anything!  But one thing I love about Top Chef is the human dynamics of it all.  They get chefs from all over the US and throw them in different situations where they need to rise to the occasion.  Since each contestant has different personalities they respond to the challenges differently, and with notable results.  One can be thrown curveballs on every challenge and create a masterpice meal, or for others just a complete disaster.  The worst performances are eventually voted out by a panel of their expert peers.

What's nice about the show is that it parallels the workings of daily life situations, even mimicking the complexities of our own corporate scenarios.  At the end of every show one contender is eliminated with the outcast being given their last say.  What's interesting is that a huge majority of the show's evictees always mention how much talent they have, how good they are and that they shouldn't have been voted out.  If all of them truly believed that, then why were they eliminated?

This brings me to the question: is talent never enough?  

You've seen this happen so many times.  Some people get promoted, some do not.  Some of them might be observed as less equipped or talented than the others but eventually are the first to get the promotion nod.  The ones left behind then wonder if there's a flaw in the system or if it's even fair.  Does some form of favoritism exist or are the bosses probably out of their minds!  So isn't it enough that I was voted most likely to succeed or the declamation champion in school to be the one to get ahead in life?

Apparently talent for some seems to be enough, but you've probably seen the outcome of that as well.  Hotshots believing that a school name or accolades give them enough of a swagger for the entire universe of opportunities to just open up to them.  They believe they deserve to be recognized, and that it's everyone's job to accord them such.

Cue buzzer: Bam! Wrong answer.

First, it is good to be talented.  But I also believe everyone is talented to begin with, it is what God gave all of us. We were once potential prodigies of some sort to begin with, and I do not believe any single person is more talented than anyone else.  Others are just lucky enough to grow up in a family and environment that fostered and supported their talents while others unfortunately were not.   

Take this as an example.  Michael Jordan wore the number 23 because he believed he was only half as good as his brother Larry, that statement coming from the greatest basketball player who ever lived.  He honestly believed his brother was twice the man he was on the basketball court.  But MJ never sat on his "half" talents just as well.  He had a burning desire to improve and be better than his brother so he spent hours upon hours practicing something that is as important as talent: skill.

A skill can be defined as the ability to do something through practice and training, take note of the words practice and training.  It is applying everything that you have learned in school, through research and observation or directly from experience.  Your negotiation, persuasion, writing and presentation skills are what you master through constant repetition and modification.  Learning to play defense is a skill as important as the natural ability to dunk the ball with ease.  MJ would have never been with one without the other.  In the same way your natural ability to persuade potential clients to buy would have been amiss without the ability to organize your thoughts into a comprehensive sales presentation.

But then again, something's still missing here.  You see, I have seen so many people who have both talent and skillset but still never reach the height of their potential.  People who have mastered their field of endeavor but still fall short of their ultimate goal.  Is there a third component other than talent AND skill?  Isn't a flair for making an excellent foié gras enough?

Daniel Goleman, the leading authority on the subject of EQ or Emotional Intelligence noted that many of today's managers were promoted due to their innate competence in their fields or departments.  They can be so-called natural born salespeople or IT whizkids who get to their positions because of their combined talents and skills.  The flipside of it all though is that they become failures as managers or leaders because they lack a very important trait:  Character.

Character is said to be a set of qualities that make a person different, special and admirable.  Well, so much for half of the contestants of the show.   A lot have more attitude problems than attitude advantages.  One of my mentors told me that character is the glue that holds talent and skill together; the body frame that holds two wheels for the bicycle to move forward. 

          

In most of Top Chef's challenges the contestants were asked to work together to either do catering for a large group of people, or 5 course dinners for a few.  In these instances the best and the worst of each one really comes to the surface.  Just as in our families, offices and communities, the need to work together becomes daunting when integrity, honesty and trust is a missing ingredient.  Most people respect technical competence in a boss but would only follow them so far.  To expect extraordinary results becomes impossible.

I would love to be purely talented, but only maybe if I was a triathlete or soloist, where the choice to compete with others is greater than to work with them.  But then again what's the use of the prize when you don't have anyone to share it with? 

Besides, in all the seasons I've seen, the one who works best with everyone else is the one who becomes Top Chef.  I'll take that recipe for success any time.

   

LEARN, UNLEARN AND RELEARN

"I'm sorry Randy, but we’re not into training right now."

I was floored, appalled even by the presuppositions of some corporate "leaders" we have today.

"I know that already" or "Been there, done that" is their common response.  They have this chip on their shoulders the size of boulders. But rather than be offended I actually pity them sometimes. They actually don't know what they're missing.  And believe me, they're missing a lot.

I tend to blame our current system of education sometimes for this predicament.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not against teachers and the teaching vocation per se. Being a coach and trainer I am as much a teacher in that regard.  Besides, teachers same as firefighters and policemen are such noble professions that I hope we could promote more. 

The art of mentoring has given way to instruction.  Do this and that without question.  Our state of teaching has become predominantly left brain centric that it has lost touch with the "why's" and more of the "what's". 

Kids nowadays don't know why they had to study Logarithms, Musical beats and the lifecycle of frogs.  They're bored and resistant.  That's why they would try to avoid the word studying as much as they can as if traumatized by the entire 14+ years of educational incarceration. 

Pop quiz hotshot:  What's the prevailing factor in the success of most businesses today? 

Information.

 

It is the currency that fuels Social Media, the World Wild Web and the stability of the stock market.  It is being informed that keeps most businesses from being outrun in a growingly competitive environment.  It is the MBA graduate who keeps the senior employees always looking in the rear view mirror and the tech geeks lording over a fiercely expanding industry.

Our ability to learn and be updated has been so convenient and immediate that you can check your stock portfolio in the middle of the street.  You can research your Biology homework with a press of a button or find and talk to long lost friends anywhere in the world.

The concept however of "outsourcing" information from consultant companies seem to be unnatural for some of us.  I can only surmise that this stems from a certain level of personal insecurity.  Honestly I couldn't blame them.  Not too many would want to admit that there are things that they don't know or understand.  It would simply be construed as a sign of weakness. 

No worries Macho Man, but how about everybody else in your team?

Warren Bennis in his book "On Becoming A Leader" said:

"Adults learn best when they take charge of their own learning.  Taking charge of your learning is a part of taking charge of your life"    

     

Most people believe that learning stops midlife, and that the rest of a person's life is spent then on teaching and nagging our kids and grandkids with stories of old.  Well these people should say that to Picasso, Churchill and Sigmund Freud.

Learning never stops, unless that is you've been living under a rock.  Henry Ford said a person who stops learning is old.  So if you are desperately looking for an anti aging supplement, try a book or two once a month for life.  Increase dosage every month thereafter.

The most learned people would be the first to tell you that they never stop looking for ways to inspire, instruct and increase their lives so that they can inspire, instruct and increase the lives of others.  Imagine this, if the average person reads around 220 words per minute and reads a book for 20 minutes a day everyday, that person would have read twenty 200 page books in one year!

So what you say?  I heard this story one time from Author and Cultural activist Alex "Pinoy" Lacson during his days in UP.  A classmate of his bragged he will one day be the Editor In Chief of , UP's official paper.  This man had a vision, and was totally committed to it that for one hour per day everyday he would read a book.  He did this habit for all of his collegiate days until he eventually landed the editorial gig in his senior year!

And the stories such as these abound.  The saying is true.  Anyone who can read but doesn't is just as good (or bad) as anyone who can't. 

Where do you stand?  How much do you know about the intricacies of your job, your industry and your business?  Do you consider trainings, seminars and workshops as an unnecessary blot in the expense ledger?  Or are you secure enough to say you need and want to learn, feel and experience more?

If you are a parent, manager or someone whom people look up to, do yourself a huge favor and pick up a book, or plug in a motivational cd.  You not only improve that gray matter in between your ears but also create a good example for everyone else to follow.  The best amongst us were NEVER content of what they already know and were always looking into continuously improving themselves. 

As many others I have found 3 steps in the learning process and they are:

1.)  UNLEARN - What you thought  you knew yesterday is probably all wrong today.  Customer demands, technology and business processes evolve in a blink of an eye that it is true that to  miss a beat is to miss the boat.  Be ready to let go of what you thought was right and all it's prejudices and start looking outwards.

2.)  LEARN - The process of acquiring USEFUL information.  Finding the necessary resources that will help you improve in your field.  But learning isn't just gobbling it all up, but rather a process of synergizing and  synthesizing.  Pick up what is useful and relevant then weed out those that don't sit well with your perspective.

3.) RE-LEARN - Self education literally becomes a habit, and a good one at that. Be tenacious and hungry for improvement.  The little increments of improvement done daily creates the world class performer.  They say talent is never enough and it's true, unless you pair it with a drive to relearn.       

This goes back to the proverbial getting out of your comfort zone and adapting to the changes in the industry.  They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, I say it depends on the trick and the dog.  20 years or so from now I would probably dread learning what would be the "in" thing in technology and communications but will give in nonetheless.  Right now we are probably wondering what else could replace Facebook or Twitter? Heck nobody ever thought anything could beat Friendster and Myspace!

Ever thought if your style of management is the same in other parts of the world or do you still believe the garbage bag Leave Alone Zap You style is the best approach?  Red or Blue Ocean?  Ever heard of Green Ocean Marketing? 

Don't know where to start?  Try looking into material related to your biggest passions whether it be cooking, personal development, self help or business.  Subsribe to blogs like these and useful articles on the web.  Click that "Like" button on sites of inspirational people and organizations.  Or better yet, pick up the best selling book of all time even without pictures; the Bible,  and feed not only your mind but also your soul.